THE MINDS JOURNAL: “10 Signs You Have A Toxic Partner Who Will Try To Take Away Your Happiness”

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One form of love, which is considered the most frequent, is, unfortunately, toxic love. This love appears as a result of insecurity or fear, and it does not do favors to anyone.

Our environment will become even more toxic when we get attached more and more to those people that are wrong for us. Toxic people have the ability to drain us of our happiness, regardless of the fact if we allow that or not. These people build their toxic relationships on an unstable foundation.

Here, we will present you some sign which indicated that you might be in such a relationship, or signs which suggest that you are with a toxic partner. You will definitely need a change when you notice these signs because toxic people and relationships cannot be suitable for every one of us.

10 Signs You Have A Toxic Partner Who Will Try To Take Away…

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MYSTICAL JOURNEY: “Be Soft with You”

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Be soft with your spirit.  Be gentle with your essence.  BE authentic to your purpose and calling.  Rid yourself from the negative self-talk.  You become everything you say that you are or that you are not.  We are born every day, every minute, every second.  We are here on borrowed time.  Make it lovingly serene with your heart so that you can present your soul lovingly to another.  This struggle is all bullshit at the end of the day.  It doesn’t matter what you did or haven’t done.  This moment, wasted reading this, or contemplating what hasn’t been scratched off your To Do List, is all irrelevant.

Really… this is nonsense.  All the fake-ness of pretending and showing others a different person in order to fit in society.  I want to know YOU… the real you that cries in your car, gets giddy at the first dog you see in…

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MOMENTS WITH MILLIE: “Rise!”

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“As you rise many people will disapprove. Rise anyway.”

~Mastin Kipp

I want you to read that meme over and over. I remember four years ago when I died in the ER and was returned to this world. I recognized that the moment I woke I was different. As days turned into months and months into years, I had to remove anyone (and anything) that disturbed my sensitivity. I could not be responsible for making the world happy, especially people who sucked the life out of me trying to find happiness. They are responsible for their own journey.

Not everyone will approve.

Not everyone will agree.

People judge from the place of their own perspective and experiences. It’s not for you to try and mold them. Let them judge. Just don’t allow them to break you.

So I stopped…I made it a point of truly disengaging from those whose addictions…

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NENA: “If Someone In Your Life Possesses These Characteristics It’s Best To Stay Away From Them”

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“Whatever the reason narcissists and sociopaths mistreat you and try to convince you that you are the problem, it’s time to end this. Making plans for the future with such person is like trying to walk through a brick wall — impossible and dangerous for your health and wellbeing.”

~NeNa

Being in a relationship with a narcissist or a sociopath is difficult on many levels, but one of the most ironic and infuriating things is when they try to convince you that you are the one who is crazy.

You would think how they can use psychology against anyone when they have so many psychological problems? And, why do they do that over and over again?

Before telling you the two possible reasons why narcissists and sociopaths shift the blame on you, here are some of their personality traits explained by Psychology Today.

Personality Traits of Narcissists

—A sense of…

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DR. TRAVIS BRADBERRY: “10 Toxic People You Should Avoid At All Costs”

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Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.

As important as it is to learn how to deal with different kinds of people, truly toxic people will never be worth your time and energy—and they take a lot of each. Toxic people create unnecessary complexity, strife, and, worst of all, stress.

“People inspire you, or they drain you—pick them wisely.”

Hans F. Hanse

Recent research from Friedrich Schiller University in Germany shows just how serious toxic people are. They found that exposure to stimuli that cause strong negative emotions—the same kind of exposure you get when dealing with toxic people—caused subjects’ brains to have a massive stress response. Whether it’s negativity, cruelty, the victim syndrome, or just plain craziness, toxic people drive your brain into a stressed-out state that should be avoided at all costs.

Studies have long shown that stress can have a lasting, negative impact on the brain. Exposure to even a few days of stress compromises the effectiveness of neurons in the hippocampus, an important brain area responsible for reasoning and memory. Weeks of stress cause reversible damage to brain cells, and months of stress can permanently destroy them. Toxic people don’t just make you miserable—they’re really hard on your brain.

The ability to manage your emotions and remain calm under pressure has a direct link to your performance. TalentSmart has conducted research with more than a million people, and we’ve found that 90% of top performers are skilled at managing their emotions in times of stress in order to remain calm and in control. One of their greatest gifts is the ability to identify toxic people and keep them at bay.

It’s often said that you’re the product of the five people you spend the most time with. If you allow even one of those five people to be toxic, you’ll soon find out how capable he or she is of holding you back.

You can’t hope to distance yourself from toxic people until you first know who they are. The trick is to separate those who are annoying or simply difficult from those who are truly toxic. What follows are ten types of toxic drainers that you should stay away from at all costs so that you don’t become one yourself.

1. The Gossip

“Great minds discuss ideas, average ones discuss events, and small minds discuss people.”

–Eleanor Roosevelt

Gossipers derive pleasure from other people’s misfortunes. It might be fun to peer into somebody else’s personal or professional faux pas at first, but over time, it gets tiring, makes you feel gross, and hurts other people. There are too many positives out there and too much to learn from interesting people to waste your time talking about the misfortune of others.

2. The Temperamental

Some people have absolutely no control over their emotions. They will lash out at you and project their feelings onto you, all the while thinking that you’re the one causing their malaise. Temperamental people are tough to dump from your life because their lack of control over their emotions makes you feel bad for them. When push comes to shove though, temperamental people will use you as their emotional toilet and should be avoided at all costs.

3. The Victim

Victims are tough to identify because you initially empathize with their problems. But as time passes, you begin to realize that their “time of need” is all the time. Victims actively push away any personal responsibility by making every speed bump they encounter into an uncrossable mountain. They don’t see tough times as opportunities to learn and grow from; instead, they see them as an out. There’s an old saying: “Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.” It perfectly captures the toxicity of the victim, who chooses to suffer every time.

4. The Self-Absorbed

Self-absorbed people bring you down through the impassionate distance they maintain from other people. You can usually tell when you’re hanging around self-absorbed people because you start to feel completely alone. This happens because as far as they’re concerned, there’s no point in having a real connection between them and anyone else. You’re merely a tool used to build their self-esteem.

5. The Envious

To envious people, the grass is always greener somewhere else. Even when something great happens to envious people, they don’t derive any satisfaction from it. This is because they measure their fortune against the world’s when they should be deriving their satisfaction from within. And let’s face it, there’s always someone out there who’s doing better if you look hard enough. Spending too much time around envious people is dangerous because they teach you to trivialize your own accomplishments.

 6. The Manipulator

Manipulators suck time and energy out of your life under the façade of friendship. They can be tricky to deal with because they treat you like a friend. They know what you like, what makes you happy, and what you think is funny, but the difference is that they use this information as part of a hidden agenda. Manipulators always want something from you, and if you look back on your relationships with them, it’s all take, take, take, with little or no giving. They’ll do anything to win you over just so they can work you over.

7. The Dementor

In J. K. Rowling’s “Harry Potter” series, Dementors are evil creatures that suck people’s souls out of their bodies, leaving them merely as shells of humans. Whenever a Dementor enters the room, it goes dark, people get cold, and they begin to recall their worst memories. Rowling said that she developed the concept for Dementors based on highly negative people—the kind of people who have the ability to walk into a room and instantly suck the life out of it.

Dementors suck the life out of the room by imposing their negativity and pessimism upon everyone they encounter. Their viewpoints are always glass half empty, and they can inject fear and concern into even the most benign situations. A Notre Dame University study found that students assigned to roommates who thought negatively were far more likely to develop negative thinking and even depression themselves.

8. The Twisted

There are certain toxic people who have bad intentions, deriving deep satisfaction from the pain and misery of others. They are either out to hurt you, to make you feel bad, or to get something from you; otherwise, they have no interest in you. The only good thing about this type is that you can spot their intentions quickly, which makes it that much faster to get them out of your life.

9. The Judgmental

Judgmental people are quick to tell you exactly what is and isn’t cool. They have a way of taking the thing you’re most passionate about and making you feel terrible about it. Instead of appreciating and learning from people who are different from them, judgmental people look down on others. Judgmental people stifle your desire to be a passionate, expressive person, so you’re best off cutting them out and being yourself.

10. The Arrogant

Arrogant people are a waste of your time because they see everything you do as a personal challenge. Arrogance is false confidence, and it always masks major insecurities. A University of Akron study found that arrogance is correlated with a slew of problems in the workplace. Arrogant people tend to be lower performers, more disagreeable, and have more cognitive problems than the average person.

How to Protect Yourself Once You Spot ’Em

Toxic people drive you crazy because their behavior is so irrational. Make no mistake about it—their behavior truly goes against reason, so why do you allow yourself to respond to them emotionally and get sucked into the mix?

The more irrational and off-base someone is, the easier it should be for you to remove yourself from their traps. Quit trying to beat them at their own game. Distance yourself from them emotionally, and approach your interactions with them like they’re a science project (or you’re their shrink if you prefer that analogy). You don’t need to respond to the emotional chaos—only the facts.

Maintaining an emotional distance requires awareness. You can’t stop someone from pushing your buttons if you don’t recognize when it’s happening. Sometimes you’ll find yourself in situations where you’ll need to regroup and choose the best way forward. This is fine, and you shouldn’t be afraid to buy yourself some time to do so.

Most people feel as though because they work or live with someone, they have no way to control the chaos. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Once you’ve identified a toxic person, you’ll begin to find their behavior more predictable and easier to understand. This will equip you to think rationally about when and where you have to put up with them and when and where you don’t. You can establish boundaries, but you’ll have to do so consciously and proactively. If you let things happen naturally, you’re bound to find yourself constantly embroiled in difficult conversations. If you set boundaries and decide when and where you’ll engage a difficult person, you can control much of the chaos. The only trick is to stick to your guns and keep boundaries in place when the person tries to cross them, which they will.

 

 

 

 

 

~via TalentSmart.com